Trembling
by WineRedKiss
Summary: trigger: abuse, rape. Katja's life is a living hell. Her parents are dead and her guardian... well, that's a secret. Can she transition from Ilvermorny to Hogwarts? Can she hold it together when Professor Severus Snape tries to pry the truth out of her?
1. Ch 1

**Disclaimer: This is a harmless work of fanfiction. The rights of the Potter-Verse belong to JK Rowlings.** **Forced minor activity, student x teacher relationship and hard themes ahead. Katja is pronounce Kah-tee-ah**. **Beware all ye who enter here.**

 **x**

 **~Chapter 1, Stoic.~**

 **x**

Katija Solomon stood with her back straight and her face carefully composed. Behind she could feel the heat from her uncle on her back. It made her skin crawl.

Lucius Malfoy wasn't her real uncle, but since the death of her parents last year he and his wife Narcissa had become her guardians. They had been good friends of her father's, and Lucius and Narcissa had been named as her God-parents.

A cold, black gloved hand rested on her shoulder and she fought the urge to shake it off.

"Katja will do well in Hogwarts, I believe." Lucius spoke crisply to the old man who stood before them.

Albus Dumbledor had to be at least one hundred, but his eyes were clear and sober. No trace of dementia glazed them, no sign of age to dull their twinkling. He seemed ageless to Katja, and in many ways... she suspected he was.

Those eyes settled on her, piercing her but not unkind as he took her measure. She met those eyes politely, betraying nothing.

"I believe she will, Lucius. However, a transfer from America no less is very uncommon at Hogwarts, especially one in their fifth year."

The hand on her shoulder tightened minutely, and Lucius spoke. "It will be fine. Draco will take her under his wing and she should be well received by the other Slytherins."

"What makes you so sure that she'll be in Slytherin house?" The HeadMaster asked, a mischievous light had come into his eyes.

Katja didn't look back, but she could imagine the offended look on her uncle's face. It almost warmed her.

Almost.

"Well, of course she would be," Lucius sneered, "Katja comes from a pure-blood family and she has the cunning and ambition to be a Slytherin."

Albus raised his hand, nodding to him indulgently before he interrupted. "Indeed, I'm sure she does... however, she will require sorting just like the others."

"Of course, HeadMaster." Lucius's hand left her shoulder and he stepped forward, coming abreast with her. His left hand rested on his cane and the other gesturing to nothing in particular. His tone was pleasant, but she knew him. He did not like being challenged.

She zoned out after that, thinking of her life before this. It seemed faded and warn, permiated by a deep sadness that she didn't know how to express. She felt numb.

Once upon a time, she had been called Kitty. She was popular at Ilvermorny, but she wasn't stuck up like the Malfoy's. She considered herself to be humble, and that it was her natural self command that had others looking toward her in admiration.

A long dark shadow slipped into the room, closing the door softly. She blinked, her eyes focusing on it.

It wasn't a shadow at all. It was just a man.

"Ah, Severus. It's always a delight to see you." Her uncle crooned, the sharpness of his smile belying his words.

The man glanced at her quizzically, but said nothing.

"Indeed, Lucius." He said politely, his voice slow and drawling.

"This is my ward, Katja Solomon. The daughter of Cornelius and Andrea Solomon. Their only child." He announced, as though she were a novelty. She felt her temper rise but she cooled it. Severus's brow raised as recognition flaired in his dark eyes and he looked down at her, studying her for a moment before nodding to Lucius.

"So I have been told."

Head Master Dumbledor gestured to Severus, "Professor Snape, if you could be so kind as to escort Miss Solomon to the Great Hall for the sorting ceremony." It sounded like a kind request, but she knew it was an order.

Evidently, so did he. He nodded curtly and gestured for her to follow him. She went without hesitation.

She'd go anywhere as long as she didn't have to stay one more moment in Lucius Malfoy's repugnant presance.

By Paracelsus... she _hated_ that man.

She didn't waste time sight seeing, she followed Professor Snape obediently, the flowing back of his robes reminded her of writhing shadows. She suspected that they were charmed to do that.

He appeared to be a man who liked to be as intimidating as possible, and the effect _was_ rather intimidating.

Their combined footfalls echoed off of the ancient stones that made up the corridor.

"I am sorry to hear of your parents." He said suddenly, stopping briefly to turn and look at her.

She halted, surprised. "Thank you, Sir."

He looked as if he wanted to say more, but he nodded and continued down the hall.

"Did you know them," she asked, "Sir?"

He inclined his head. "I knew your father, once when we were young. Your mother I met only on occasion."

She digested this slowly, and determined that she knew where he'd known them from. He parents had been American Sympathisers of Voldemort's.

Lucius had been a Death Eater, and she would bet that so did Professor Snape.

Katja kept this to herself, of course. She wasn't supposed to know that Dear Uncle Lucius was a Death Eater, after all. It'd been by chance that she saw his dark mark, and he'd threatened her in order to keep her silent about it.

She had a lot to stay silent about, where he was concerned, that was for sure. Her shoulders sagged and she looked ahead, trying not to feel suffocated. She gritted her teeth, trying to force the phantoms of memories she didn't want to think of away.

 _I HATE HIM._

She seethed, mentally screaming as loud as she could.

Ahead of her, Professor Snape flinched slightly, turning his head to glance at her curiously as he paused infront of two large oak doors.

She blinked at him, unsure of why they were stopping again.

His black eyes turned suspicious and she felt a subtle sensation rise on her scalp, like gentle fingers running through her hair. She shook her head and smoothed it.

Was there a spider in her hair?

The man straightened abruptly, and opened the doors.

Inside there was a cacophony of sound, hundreds of students sat at four tables, a large table at the far end of the room held several -of who she assumed to be- teachers. Directly infront of a large podium was a three-legged stool and an old wizard's hat. She glanced around curiously until she noticed that Professor Severus had begun to move towards an Elderly witch who stood in charge of a large number of what she assumed to be first years.

He spoke quickly to the witch, gesturing back at her. Katja stood a respective distance from them, but she could hear her name; Katja Solomon.

Then the man left, turning on his dragonskin booted heel and settling himself at the high table with the other teachers.

She fell into line behind the first years until the witch came over to her.

"I am Professor McGonagall," she said briskly, her lips permanently pursed. "I am the Transfiguration Professor as well as deputy Head Mistress of Hogwarts. As transfer students are somewhat of a rarity here, you will be sorted first, please go to the head of the line."

"Yes, ma'am." Katja said, making her voice even and sweet. She gave her a small smile and then left her to fuss at a small boy somewhere in the line behind her.

Katja moved swiftly to the front of the room, looking at the sorting hat curiously, unsure as to what she should expect.

After a few more moments and the Head Master's appearance, Katja's name was called.

She felt the weight of the entire school's gaze upon her as she sank down onto the stool, carefully balancing herself. She chanced a glance behind her and locked eyes with Professor Snape. His expression was unreadable but he gave her a small nod of acknowledgment.

Katja turned back around and Professor McGonagall came forward to gently place the old raggedy hat on her head.

A voiced filled her mind. A soft gasp.

 _Ah, how angry you are... Katja. How full of pain and hate. You poor child._ The hat made a soft tsking sound. _You have such heart, such intellect, ambition... bravery... good. Very well rounded. What house were you in Ilvermorny?_ The hat asked, not bothering with her reply as he plucked it out of her mind. _Ah, Wampus. A warrior, are you? Yes... I can feel the power inside of you. A powerful witch indeed... better be..._

"GRYFFINDOR!" The hat shouted out loud, startling her. The table to her left erupted in applause and the hat was promptly plucked off of her head. She made her way to the Gryffindor table and sank down, two red-headed boys came to either side of her and clapped her on the back.

"Congratulations," they spoke in unison. She looked between them in surprise. "I'm Fred, and he's George."

"Um..." she began, looking uncertainly between the two boys.

The boy on the left frowned at the one on the right. "I'm Fred, and that over there is George."

"No, I'm Fred!" The twin countered.

She smiled at them, a small laugh huffing out of her as she watched them squabble.

"Alright, alright. He is Fred." The right twin said, smiling at her.

"I assume that makes you George?" She asked, teasingly.

Maybe it was going to be fun here after all.


	2. Ch 2

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine.**

x

 **~Chapter 2, Pondering.~**

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Severus sat in his office, looking through the file on the Solomon girl. He had to confess that he was rather disappointed that she'd been sorted into Gryffindor.

She had rattled him earlier in the corridor. Projecting her thoughts so loudly that he could hear it. He was naturally gifted at both legilimency and occulemency, but still. She must possess some talent in order to project that loudly.

 _I HATE HIM!_

He recalled. He was fairly certain that she wasn't talking about him. Perhaps her father... or Malfoy?

With those words he'd also been overcome by great sorrow for a moment and the oddest sensation of breath on the back of his neck.

He chewed on the inside of his lip as he pictured her in his minds eye.

Slender, bordering dangerously on thin. Thick, dark, almost blood red hair that was braided into a rope that hung heavily over one shoulder. Clever green eyes. Pale skin with just one small freckle below her left eye. Her carefully composed features giving away nothing.

He had a sneaking suspicion that Lucius was hurting her. Beating her, probably.

But that sensation of breath on the back of his neck and that shiver of fear... he pushed the thought out of his mind. If Lucius was beating her, it was none of his business. Evidently the girl could withstand it, and he did not need to get tangled up in it. Lucius was nothing if not a man who lived to abuse and show his power over others. He was most likely training her to teach her to stay in line. Katja seemed to possess a strong will. It would be the natural response of Lucius to try to break it.

He gathered up the papers on his desk and shoved them back into the file. He'd learned that she had been a Wampus, not that it really meant anything to him. She was 15, parent deceased. Only child. Above average in all of her classes.

So with that he put the small red-head out of his mind and finished the preparations for his classes that would be coming all too soon.


	3. 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.** x

x **~Chapter 3, Hard to Concentrate.~** x

x

Katja was still adjusting. Life at Hogwarts seemed as though it would suit her just fine, even though she still missed Ilvermorny terribly.

It was lunch time, and Fred and George sat on either side of her at the long Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. She smiled and waved at Ron, the youngest Weasley son, who sat farther down with his friends Hermione and Harry. They were the same age -15- but for some reason she just didn't fit in with their little trio.

That suited her fine, Fred and George were good company and quite entertaining as they filled her in on the details of their skiving snack box. She made a mental note to steer clear of ALL British wizard sweets that were unfamiliar.

Particularly the puking pastilles and fever fudge.

"So, what was Ilvermorny like?" Fred asked conversationally. Katja's green eyes flickered to his and she smiled warmly. George leaned in on her other side to hear.

"Is quite lovely, much more modern feeling than Hogwarts. It's tucked away in Massachusetts, in the mountains. It's similar to Hogwarts. there's also four houses, Wampus, Pukwudgie, Horned Serpant, and Thunderbird."

"Are they like our houses?" George asked curiously. She shook her head.

"No, not really. The Ilvermorny houses represent the wizard-or witch- themselves. Wampus is the body, they favor warriors. Pukwudgie is the heart, they're healers. Horned Serpant is the mind, natural scholars, and Thunderbird is the soul. They're adventurers." She ticjed each house off one by one. "I am- was- a Wampus." She smiled serenely at the twins who were mulling her words over.

"What would we be?" They asked in unison. She laughed, hardly having to think.

"You would both definitely be Thunderbirds."

x

Later that day she had potions with Professor Snape. It was nothing short of unpleasant. She worked quietly and diligently, not bothering to send her pity to those around her that were unfortunate enough go be the recipients of Professor Snape's ire.

The Draught of Living Death was more complex than she'd thought and it aggravated her thoroughly. She bit her lip, gently introducing her crushed bezoar into the cauldron before stirring it. She felt a presance at her back and she looked to find Professor Snape stooping over her menacingly.

Katja looked back at him, unfazed. Their gazes locked in some silent battle of will. His black eyes were like dark glass, cutting and brutal.

She was a Wampus, and they didn't back down from a fight.

"May I help you, Professor?" She said sweetly, but her face was hard with challenge.

He furrowed his brows and glared down at her in distaste before gesturing to her potion.

"Why, yes, Miss Solomon. You could help me by _not_ allowing your potion to smoke up my classroom."

She narrowed her eyes at him before turning them on her potion, which was just barely begining to release smoke. She promptly stirred it, glancing back over her shoulder at the Professor who stood smirking at her.

"10 points from Gryffindor."

"Uh, no." She said, disgust rising in her voice as she stared at him. There was a collective intake of breath and gasps from her fellow students.

"Yes." His eyes were dangerous and hard.

"You came to me, to purposely distract me with your glowering and doom and gloom attitude in order for you to find _something_ wrong with my potion, which was quickly remedied." She jabbed her finger at the potion in question which was no longer smoking.

"Had you not been distracted, you never would have noticed me behind you." He countered, expanding his hands and giving a half shrug.

"Oh, please... It's hard to ignore the sensation and heat from someone's body pressed against yours, Sir." By some miracle she resisted the urge to roll her eyes at him.

Professor Snape looked horrified.

"I most certainly was _not_ pressing my- my _body_ against you, Miss Solomon. I was looking over your shoulder into your cauldron."

Katja blinked in surprise at the slow and barely perceivable blush coloring his pale cheeks and found herself apologizing. "I'm sorry sir, I did not mean to imply- um- that you were purposely trying to make contact with me. I just noticed the temperature increase behind me. That's all."

His face smoothed and he sneered at her. "Indeed, and that will still be 10 points from Gryffindor. Plus a detention."

Before she could protest he was almost on the other side of the room. Katja growled in frustration, pouring that anger into her potion.

 _It's gonna be the best fucking potion in the room..._ she seethed as she glanced up at Professor Snape, their eyes making contact. He raised an eyebrow at her, and she swore he had heard her.

But that was ridiculous. He'd have to be a legilimens.


	4. Ch 4

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine.** **x** **Show some love with a review!** x

x

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~Chapter 4, Clash.~

x

x

The last thing Katja wanted to do was to serve detention tonight, not that she particularly had anything better to do. She'd probably just hang out in the commons with Fred and George and do homework or help them with their practical joke planning.

She stopped by her dormitory to refresh her parchment and ink, unsure as to what the exact nature of her detention would be tonight.

Probably something god-awful and boring. Something to waste her time a flair Snape's ego. Katja rolled her eyes at the thought, seeing in her mind Professer Snape's disapproving glower. His arms crossed and his chin lifted defiantly, as if to say _I have the power_.

Great. That's just what she needed... to be around some kind of power hungry psycho. As if she didn't have enough of those in her life already...

She was getting used to the maze-like layout of the school, and so she wasted little time getting to the cold dungeon potion's classroom.The air was perpetually damp and chill, owing to the fact that it was partially underneath the lake. The very idea made her shiver. She didn't particularly like the idea of being underwater, especially under a lake that was home to innumerable sea creatures like mermaids, grendilows, and the rumored giant squid. She still wasn't sure if that was true or not.

The classroom door was open, and Professor Snape sat at his desk making a show of grading papers. She was certain that he knew she was standing there, but he said nothing. After a moment of quietly watching him, Katja entered the room. She'd foregone her thick braid that day and instead her hair hung free and wild around her face. She was sure she'd have to tie it back.

The thick red locks were impossible to deal with if she had to do anything other than sit still. Snape waited until the last possible moment before he looked up at her. His face was a mask, and if she could see her own, she'd say the same about it as well.

"Good evening, Professor." Katja said quietly, her voice bouncing around the empty room.

"Good evening," he replied automatically, his brow furrowing. He gestured to a pile of papers stacked precariously on the edge of his desk. "First year potions essays. I should think you could manage them. Then you will reorganize the store room. When you're done, you may leave."

She took the pile deftly and made her way to a desk in the front of the room, aware of Professor Snape's eyes on her the entire time. Katja was still a little angry, but she accepted her punishment with grace. After all, she did behave quite belligerently earlier and she embarrassed him to boot. Severus Snape was _not_ a man that took well to being disrespected.

She sifted through the papers quickly and accurately, her head throbbing and her brows furrowing in disgust at several of the answers throughout them. She didn't understand why even first years would make these mistakes. Some of the answers were down right ridiculous. No wonder why Professor Snape wanted nothing to do with them.

Katja snuck a peek at him and watched him while he worked for a moment. He was silent reading a roll of parchment, his head bowed over it. His shoulder-length black hair made a silky curtain that partially obscured his face. It was all part of the act, she was sure of it. He wanted to keep everyone away.

 _I wonder, what kind of person are you really, Professor?_

He looked up, aware that he was being watched and she blushed and quickly looked back down to her own work. Katja hadn't meant to stare. She was just curious about him. His sour demeanor and attitude grated on her and terrified and made all of his students have him.

Not that she hated him. She could understand that it was showmanship. It was simply a tool that he used to make his life easier. No one bothered you when you didn't like them, and loneliness didn't hurt when you were the one controlling it. If he had no one close to him, how could he miss companionship?

Finally, after what Katja was certain equalled a century, she finished the first year essays. She gathered the thick stack up and walked over to Professor Snape's desk.

He looked up from the parchment he was currently marking and took them from her before rising to escort her to the ingredients store room. She followed, her nose wrinkling as they stepped into the small room.

It didn't stink, not exactly. It had a particular odor though...

It was readily apparent to what needed done, but the surly potion's master explained anyway.

"Alphabetize this mess. For each ingredient you can't identify, I want you to leave it on the lower shelf. When I return to see how you've done, I will assign you an essay based on them."

She frowned at him as he finished, her eyes roving over the shelves. "Sir, forgive me... but seeing as that I'm from America, many of our common names for plants are different from yours. Am I supposed to arrange them based on their Latin names or will I be punished for knowing them by a different name?"

The question gave him pause as he considered this.

"Arrange them all according to their Latin names." He said finally, turning and leaving her in the store room to sort it out.

Katja worked diligently, arranging the plants and herbs without much effort. A small jar of dried wings were unable to be identified and so she set them on the lower shelf, as he had told her to.

She was reaching up as high as she could, stretching to place a jar of dried _Agrimonia Eupatoria_ otherwise known to her as Church Steeple on the very top of the shelf with the other A's when she felt a body brush against hers, taking the jar from her hand and setting it on the shelf with ease.

Katja flattened against the shelves, her heart thumping and adrenaline shooting through her as she let out a soft noise of distress. Memories surged around her and she could feel Uncle Lucuis's hands on her again.

She closed her eyes and pressed her hands to her ears and sank to the floor. The phantom sensation of those cold hands stroking her thighs making her sick. His hot breath against the nape of her neck and his chest crushing her against the wall as he groped and touched her... reaching underneath her dress and rubbing her intimate areas. His lips leaving hot trails on her neck and his demanding body grinding against hers.

It took her a minute to come back to the present. She was sitting on the floor sobbing. Katja was horrified as she hauled herself to her feet, using the shelf as leverage. She backed away quickly, turning to face Professor Snape. She still had tears in her eyes and her heart was racing but she took deep breaths to try to control it.

He had taken several steps back to give her more room and he studied her wearily, looking almost into her it seemed. "Are you alright?"

Katja hastily wiped her eyes, not caring if it smeared her mascara or eyeliner. "Yes, sir. I'm sorry. You just frightened me... that's all."

"Miss Solomon, if you had acted frightened or startled, I could believe that... but you seem more... traumatized." He said slowly and unsurely, as if he were confused as to why he even cared enough to ask.

Katja straightened her robes, wrapping her arms around herself to try to conceal her trembling. "I don't really want to talk about it, if it's all the same to you. I'm sorry."

He clenched his jaw, his black eyes flashing. "No, Miss Solomon. It's not "all the same" to me. I demand an explanation for what just happened. I just watched you reduced to a whimpering mess on my store room floor because I came up behind you to assist you before you broke something."

Katja looked up defiantly, her emerald eyes shining. "Well, you're not going to get one!"

Professor Snape went still for a moment before drawing his wand, faster than she could react.

" _Legilimens!"_

Katja felt like a hand had reached into her mind and she could do nothing to stop it, she was immobilized by it.


	5. Ch 5

**Disclaimer: I don't not own the right to JK's Potter-Verse.** **x** **x** ~Ch. 5, Secrets.~

x

x

Severus dove into the girl's mind roughly, a little too roughly, he might admit if he wasn't so angry. Couldn't the stupid girl see that he was just trying to help?

He didn't have to journey far to find the memories he had accidently triggered, and what he saw made him freeze.

Lucius Malfoy had Katja pinned to the wall, one hand wrapped around her and squeezing her breast and the other buried between her thighs, He was grinding against her while he rubbed her through her pale pink panties. Her dress was pulled up and bunched around her hips.

Severus attempted to pull out of the memory in his shock, but Katja had clenched her mind down, trapping him for now. He could tear free if he wanted, but it would cause her a lot of pain. For now it seemed, he had to watch.

Lucius moved the hand from between her thighs and gripped her hair tightly, his nails digging into her scalp and pressing her face into the wall, forcing her to bend over. Katja didn't make a sound, but tears flowed down her cheeks from her closed eyes. Severus turned away as Lucius positioned himself and thrust into her roughly. She cried out and he bashed her head against the wall.

"Be silent." He hissed, continuing his assult.

Sickness rose in him, memories of past Death Eater revelries coming to mind. Lucius always did participate, and seemed to enjoy himself thoroughly. It was no wonder he couldn't control himself. He must have missed it.

Severus had never been one for rape. It just didn't appeal to him. While he'd been forced to participate on occasion out of expectation, he didn't enjoy it and was as gentle as he could get away with and he'd finish quickly, sometimes not finishing at all.

He had brushed her mind before her sorting, gently pulling memories free. They weren't telling. Just bits of school and the odd perspective of looking up at Lucius. Now he could imagine the activities that lead to such perspectives.

He supposed he shouldn't care, that Lucius would do whatever he wanted to the girl. There wasn't _really_ anything he could do about it. It had evidently been going on for quite some time.

He wondered if Cornelius's corpse had even grown cold before Lucius began raping his only daughter.

He doubted it.

With that thought, the scene shifted. Lucius groping her here, touching her there. Forcing a kiss. It was a calidoscope of abuse until it settled on what must have been the very first time.

Lucius came to her in the middle of the night. The girl was wearing nothing but a thin blue night gown, her vibrant blood red hair tumbling in waves around her heart shaped face. Severus could see the lust in Lucius's eyes, but Katja didn't.

He sat at the edge of her bed, feigning care and understanding. She'd seen her parents murdered after all. He got closer to her, resting his hand on her knee. She pulled away uncomfortably but Lucius held it there. Still talking.

"I'm keeping you here out of kindness, paying your tuition so you can continue your schooling at Hogwarts. It's out of friendship and love for your father, but... I will have certain... expectations. If you will." He said pleasantly, as if it were the most reasonable thing in the world. He brushed his hand across her face, catching stay strands of hair and tucking them behind her ear.

Katja looked at him with confusion in her eyes, "Expectations, Uncle?"

Gently, the hand on her knee crept up and between her thighs and slipped beneath the hem of her night gown. She pressed her knees together and grabbed his hand.

"What are you doing?" She cried out in disbelief, the beginnings of fear and understanding coming into her eyes.

Lucius answered her by grabbing a fist full of her hair and pulling her to him, his mouth taking possession of hers. She shrieked and attempted to shove and smack him away, but he didn't care.

He pushed her down on her back roughly, forcing her thighs apart and trapping her with his body weight. She screamed against his mouth, straining to free herself. Lucius pulled her panties to the side and plunged two fingers inside of her.

Katja froze with a pained groan and then whimpered. She dug her nails into Lucius's back, but his clothing protected him. Lucius actually laughed.

"I was hoping you'd be a virgin. It's been a long time since I've had one. This a nice little treat for me." He said crudely, "I'm going to enjoy every single minute of it."

"No," Katja said again, her face red and wet with tears as she renewed the fight against him. "You can't!"

He back handed her and she gasped in pain, one hand automatically flying to her damaged lips.

"I can do whatever I want!" He said mockingly.

Even Severus winced in sympathy as blood gushed from her mouth. Her teeth had shredded the inside of her lip.

Lucius scoffed in disgust, grabbing her by the hips and attempting to force her to turn over onto her stomach. For a moment Katja resisted, kicking out at him.

"No!" she screamed, her foot connecting solidly with his chest.

Lucius's breath came out in a huff and his eyes narrowed into dangerous ice blue slits. His wand was drawn in a second.

"Cruicio!" He spat, and Katja's body began to spasm and she writhed on the bed, screaming and begging unintelligably for him to stop. After an impossibly long moment he did and she lay still, panting and whimpering with pain.

Severus knew full well how the cruiciatus curse hurt, and his nostrils flared at the sight of her. He'd always known that Lucius was a horrible human being. It wasn't as if he'd needed proof to know what he was capable of. He'd tormented muggle women- and even witches- exactly like this while raping then before.

None had ever been as young as Katja though. The Dark Lord forbade the Death Eaters from raping children. Kill them? Sure. Torture? Of course. He however as evil and twisted as he was drew the line at pedophilia.

At 14, just before her 15th birthday, Katja hadn't even been kissed and probably had no idea of nor had she felt carnal desire.

Lucius wasted no time and drug her onto her stomach, pulling her panties off and getting on top of her. He pushed into her protesting body without mercy. She screamed out in pain, thrashing and bucking beneath him as he took her violently. One hand wrapped around her throat and she gasped for breath as he choked her, making it nearly impossible for her to continue screaming.

Severus didn't want to watch this. He was ready to leave, even though Katja's mind was still clenched protectively. It would hurt, but there was no telling what other atrocities she'd accidently show him next. It was time to leave.

x

Severus pulled out of her mind, feeling as though he was rising through a vat of glue into the real world. It swam into sickening focus around him. Katja's knees buckled and he crossed the room to catch her before she fell and busted her head on the shelf.

She was light in his arms, the small bird-like bones of her upper arms obviously fragile. He shifted his grip on her to her shoulders, her slack body resting against his chest.

His heart raced and his face burned with shame. He shouldn't have done that. It was completely inappropriate to have seen her like that...

It wasn't as though he'd enjoyed it or become aroused- if any thing, it made him want to vomit. But still.

Legilimency was strange in the way that subtle sensations could be gleaned from memories and he had the disgusting residual feeling on Lucius against his own body, but it was mercifully faint.

He supposed he should be grateful that he'd been mostly in control.

Sometimes, a person could pull you so completely into themselves that their experiences felt like yours. No longer a spectator, you could feel what they felt, see what they saw, taste what they tasted...

A small whimper drew his attention back to the girl cradled against him. Something in him would not allow him to treat her with a rougher hand at the moment after what he'd seen.

Legilimency only took moments to view what you wished, but he felt as though he'd been in her mind for hours. He lifted Katja with ease and brought her to his office, waving away the wards on his personal chamber and depositing her on the couch in his small sitting room.

Severus carefully tucked a small couch pillow beneath her head and summoned a blanket. He draped it over her, searching her unconscious face.

After a moments contemplation he walked to his cabinet and grabbed a Dreamless Sleep draught. He brought it back to the girl in his sitting room, using his thumb to separate her lips and open her mouth enough so he could poor it down her throat.

Katja swallowed reflexively and Severus felt himself relax. She'd have a horrendous headache when she woke, but he had a potion on hand to help her with that. For now, he would go into his office and let her sleep.

He had a lot to think about.


	6. Ch 6

**Disclaimer: I still do not own the rights to Harry Potter. This is just a hobby.** **x** **Show me some love, I'm waiting for my first review!** **x** **x** **x** ~Chapter 6, Transparency.~

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Katja woke up, her eye lids slow to obey when she tried to open them. She could feel that she was laying down, a warm blanket covered her. She groped for it and snuggled down tighter.

A moment later she felt a hand on her side and she jumped awake, her eyes snapping open and then shut again as a blinding pain split her skull.

Memories surfaced of Professor Snape using legilimency on her, forcing her to relive and show him memories of Lucius assaulting her.

She placed both hands on either side of her head and groaned. That damned hand was back. Gripping her by the chin and pulling her face towards the light of the fire place. A bottle was pressed to her lips and a bitter liquid flowed into her mouth. She swallowed it, having no choice as the hand continued to pour it.

Then it was gone, and she heard the glass clank on an invisible table somewhere in front of her.

After a few moments the burning in her skull began to subside. It felt like someone had attempted to bust it open with a wedge and hammer. She opened one eye expirementally, seeing the tall dark figure that she recognized as Professor Snape. His black eyes were watching her.

Katja wanted to be angry, but she didn't have the energy. What was done was done and in a way... she was grateful to have someone to share her secret with.

"Hi," she whispered to him quietly, turning over onto her other side and tucking her fists under her chin.

He arched a black brow, sinking down in the soft green armchair in front of her. "How are you feeling?" He asked, sitting stiffly and obviously uncomfortable.

Katja felt self-conscious about what he'd seen. She blushed crimson, knowing that he'd seen her naked... and even more so with the shame of knowing that he'd seen memories of Lucius raping her.

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Severus did his best to keep his face blank. He knew that Katja didn't mean to project her thoughts and even though it was true, it's not as though he'd leered. Lucius was in the way most of the time anyway...

Not that he'd bring that up.

He shifted awkwardly in front of her as the image of her pressed against the wall flashed through his mind. Some things you just _couldn't_ unsee.

"I... I think I'm okay." Her blush darkened and he sighed.

"There's no need to be embarrassed, Miss Solomon. It was my fault for invading your mind." He said slowly. It was as close to an apology as the witch as going to get.

"I know what you saw..." her lips trembled but the blush receeded. "but I don't know _how_ much."

Severus sighed and ran an aggravated hand through his hair, looking everywhere but at the girl infront of him.

This was _not_ something he wanted to talk about. Everything about tonight had been extremely inappropriate.

"When I invaded your thoughts, you clamped down in attempt to protect yourself. It's a common reaction and why a willing participant is preferred. When you clamp down on your thoughts after someone has already invaded them, you trap them. That's why your head was hurting so badly. I had to, in essence, rip myself out of your mind." He explained. It was a lot more complex than that, but he'd spare her the details. It would take hours to explain all of the complications of legilimency, even more the principles of occulemency and it's natural -unintentional- counterparts.

They sat facing each other, her green eyes searching his face.

"So, what all did you see?"

"Everything that you remembered. I saw what Lucius did to you, as a spectator. It was like I was standing right next to you." He pressed his lips together, pushing away another snippet of memory.

This perverse _smutt_ was the last thing he needed occupying his mind. Not to mention, it was very awkward for him to sit here when she kept sending him random bits of memory and nudeness, so slowly he pulled down his occulemency shields.

Katja lowered her eyes to the floor, her bottom lip quivering. "Can you help me?"

Severus opened his mouth slightly and then shut it again, looking away and resting his hand against his face. Katja continued watching him, hopeful and yet sorrowful all the while.

"No," he said finally, watching as that fragile hope flickered out of her eyes. "I can't."

"Why?" She asked, her voice tight and cracking.

Severus leveled his gaze on her, the oddest regret settling inside him. He knew what Lucius was doing to her, and yet here he sat unwilling- no- _unable_ to do anything about it.

"Lucius and I have a long and complex... history." He said, knowing she needed an answer.

Thankfully, she seemed to understand and accept it. With followers of Voldemort as her parents, and Lucius as her guardian... she probably knew what complex history he was referring to.

With the Dark Lord having come back... there was no telling what unfortunate fate she'd have now.

Her eyes filled but the tears didn't fall. She threw the covers off of herself and swung her legs to get into a sitting position.

"Okay. Thank you, Professor. I'd like to leave now, if that's alright." Katja said hallowly, her eyes trained on something across the room.

"It's four o'clock in the morning, obscenely after curfew. I can't just turn you loose to wander the halls or disturb your fellow housemates with your arrival." He said, frowning in disapproval.

"So... what do I do until morning?" She asked, looking around the room.

"I suppose, we wait." He replied.


	7. 7

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.** **x** **x** **x**

~Ch. 7, Morning's light.~

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Katja laid back down on the couch. It wasn't very comfortable, but she didn't care. The silver comforter on top of her was warm and it chased away the damp chilliness of the dungeon. She'd never been in one of her teacher's personal chambers before.

It wasn't much different that a common room, really. Smaller, made to be homey yet comfortable. The fire that roared in the grate made long shadows dance around the room. Professor Snape sat immobile in the chair across from her, reading a potions book.

The silence was pleasant, all things considered. Katja snuggled deeper under the blanket and yawned, pulling it up to her nose. A deep, rich and earthy smell hit her. It held just the smallest hint of smoke, herbs, and a warm male muskiness. It was comforting, in a strange way. A lazy thought surfaced.

"Is this the blanket from your bed?" Katja asked him drowsily. Professor Snape looked up, his gaze flickering to the blanket for fraction of a second with disinterest before he looked back down at his book.

"Yes, it is." A few more moments passed as he turned pages and scanned them.

"It smells nice," she yawned again, turning over and wrapping herself in the blanket, inhaling. "like what it smells like when it rains and fresh parchment... I like it."

Her eyelids closed and her breathing evened out, the end of her sentance stretching as she dropped off to sleep.

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Severus stared at her dumbfounded for a moment before scowling.

 _It smells nice, like what it smells like when it rains and fresh parchment... I like it._ He wasn't sure if that was a complement or if it was something he should be offended over. He couldn't recall anyone ever commenting on his own personal scent before, and that _was_ what she was smelling. He owned no other blankets, so of course that one would have his scent all over it.

He probably should have _scorgified_ it before he covered with it. Fifteen year old girls sniffing his blankets and telling him he smelled good was just... uncomfortable.

So why did it please him to know that his odor was pleasant to her? Was he that desperate for a complement and to be humanized that the half-concious words of a girl could make him feel this way?

He sincerely hope not; Katja Solomon had already proven herself to be nothing more than a mess that he was sure he wanted no part of. As soon as it was a decent time to arrive to breakfast, he'd wash his hands of her.

But for now, he studied her as she slept... trying to piece her together.

The Dark Lord would most likely be summoning him within the next few days and he found himself wondering as he gazed at her small form underneath his blanket if there may not be a way he could save her from Lucius after all. His master used legilimency on him quite often... if he just so happened to plant the memories of tonight inside his occulemency shields, perhaps Lord Voldemort would _persuade_ Lucius to refrain from his vile abuse of her. Knowing that her parents were his loyal American followers may make him inclined to _"protect_ " her...

It could also put her in the danger of being in _his_ presance.

Severus wasn't entirely sure if it'd be worth the risk.

Katja was an excellent witch as far as he could tell, so who knew what he would do. Make her a death eater, perhaps? If he could alter his memories to make her seem clumsy, weak or incompetent... maybe that could keep his curiosity off of the girl.

Yes. That may work.

He'd have no use for a timid and foolish girl as a Death Eater, no matter her blood status or parents loyalty. He knew that at the very least, Lord Voldemort was capable of a form of dispassionate pity of lesser beings. Those who did not possess the proper strengths to be one of his followers... A tender heart would be of no use to him.

A quiet whimper snapped him back into focus. Katja's brows were knit together and her lip caught between her teeth while she slept. Quietly, gently, he rose from his chair and stroked her hair. Just once, using subtle legilimency to supplant one single idea; rest.

Her pinched face went slack and an almost imperceptible snoring began. He drew his hand away, measuring her with his eyes to make sure that she did not stir as he retreated back to the arm chair.

Damn his heart.

He wished the blackened thing would just rot already. Merlin knew that his life would be that much easier for it. It wasn't as though he were using it for much more that living at any rate, and given his status as a Death Eater and double agent, that could stop at any moment.

He cracked open his book again, roaming the page until he came back to where he had left off.

 _Practical applications of betony and rose-oil tinctures for trauma..._


	8. ch 8

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.**

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 **Big** **thanks to my first reviewer, _Nilsia-Tengun_. I'm really glad that you are enjoying it. I hope you continue to follow the story!**

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A hand shook her shoulder, not roughly, but not exactly gentle. It was startling to say the least.

katja let out a squeal and flailed one arm while using the other to pull the covers closer to herself, as if they could protect her. Two black eyes like lumps of coal in a pale face stared at her in the dim light.

" _Paracelcus..."_ she hissed, glaring up into them. "God, you're frightening. You know that, don't you?"

Professor Snape pulled away from her, his lips pursed in bemusement. His hand lightly brushing her shoulder as he withdrew. Katja sat up hastily. Her red hair was mussed from sleep, but to her surprise there were no large snarls as she combed it with her long slender fingers.

With a clatter, her wand slid from its holster out of her sleeve and struck the stone at her feet. A few sparks flew from it as it came to rest against the toe of Professor Snape's dragon hide boots. The slender black wand began to roll away and he bent down stiffly and retrieved it, studying it with apparent interest in the glow of firelight coming from behind him. He turned it over several times, carefully testing its pliancy.

"This is not a common wandwood... Blackthorn, isn't it?" He glanced up at Katja and she nodded.

"Yes, sir."

"Unyeilding, twelve inches..." he inspected it from every angle and for whatever reason, it made her grow steadily more uncomfortable. "what about the core?"

"Uh, hair of wampus." She said clearing her throat.

Professor Snape frowned at it for a moment, running a finger tip over the few small but sharp thorns near it's handle and the carved rose at the end of it.

Katja knew it was an impressive piece of wandsmanship. It's maker had been very proud of it.

"Is a Wampus core quite regular in the United States?" He asked, still studying it.

"No, sir. It's not."

"I see." He gave it one more calculated once over before handing it to her. The wood was warm fron his touch and she blushed.

Handling someone else's wand was invasive. It was picking up a musicians instrument and playing it in front of them. She slipped it back into its holster and stood up, straightening her robes.

Professor Snape stood near an almost invisible doorway marked with ancient runes, obviously layered with wards. Curious, Katja approached him as he lowered the wards. A rush of power flowed through her and she gasped in delight as they were dispelled, the reminants of his magic fading. She grinded at him.

"You can do wandless magic?"

Professor Snape glanced down at her in surprise before ushering her through the doorway that now lead to his office. "I can perform a few spells and charms wandlessly and non-verbally."

Katja beamed, her eyes shiny with excitement. "Could you teach me?"

"No," he answered.

Katja sighed, looking up at him with her bottom lip poked out. She knew it probably wouldn't work, but she made her eyes look as pitiful as she could and clasped her hands under her chin.

He just stared at her in obvious confustion, so she batted her long eye lashes, speaking in her sweetest voice. "Please?"

He shook his head, his features hardening with aggitation and a hint of disgust. "Are you attempting to manipulate me with your childish pouting?"

Katja dropped her hands with a sigh. "Yes, sir. It didn't work, did it?"

"I've had my share of pretty eyes batted at me in my time, Miss Solomon, it would take far more than that to manipulate me. Furthermore, it can not be taught. It comes with age, self mastery, and practice. It's not that I'm opposed to teaching you wandless magic, I simply can't. Non-verbal magic, perhaps, but not wandless."

Katja smiled at him, feeling more at ease. Professor Snape could actually be quite... pleasant when he wanted to be. It was a wonder why he put on the act he did. More flies are caught with honey, after all.

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They made their way out of the dungeons where they parted ways on the stairs. It was early, but not too early to bathe and dress and then make her way to the Great Hall for breakfast. Once in Gryffindor tower, Katja attended to the necessary.

Last night was a strange night. She'd never been so... open and vulnerable to anyone before.

Sure, Lucius had violated her- been violating her- all summer... but this was different. She felt like all of herself had been bared before Professor Snape, like he truly could know her from the inside out, having access to every intimate detail of her life. It was an odd thought and she shook it away with a blush.

Of course he could, not because he _cared_ but simply because he was an obviously powerful legitimens.

Katja emerged into the commonroom and took a moment to center herself before she made her way to the Great Hall. Very few students were awake at this time, but most of the staff were seated at the high table. Katja kept her gaze lowered to the floor, settling down at rhe Gryffindor table. Immediately, her plate filled with her favorite breakfast items and she tucked into a raspberry and white chocolate scone.

She felt the weight of eyes on her and she glanced up, meeting Professor Snape's onyx stare with her own. Katja wasn't sure what it meant, but after a few moments of staring she began to feel that subtle sensation of a hand running through her hair.

She knew it had to be him using subtle legilimency and she ought to be angry but instead she enjoyed the sensation. She could almost imagine that he was running his hands through her long red hair, his warm chest against hers as he gazed down at her...

Almost as soon as that thought entered her mind, the sensation stopped and her eyes refocused on him.

He had a look of horror on his face and he dropped his gaze to his plate, buzzing himself with his food.

 _Oh my God._.. she thought to herself. She hadn't meant to picture that. Her face turned scarlet as she attempted to eat but she couldn't stop thinking of the look of Professor Snape's face.

He didn't look at her or prod her mind again that morning. It was fine by her. It had just been a wandering thought, but she was mortified by it.


	9. Ch 9

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.**

x **Please forgive** **me for my absence. I've been in the hospital and haven't really been doing much other than sleeping and having blood drawn every 6 hours for the past few weeks.**

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Chapter 9.

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Severus was mortified by the time he left the Great Hall. The perverse imaginings of that... _girl_.

How dare she think such thoughts about him?

 _Him, of all people!_

He growled in disgust at the image of her hungry eyes as she stared up into his, her soft and inviting lips parted and her face flushed. His hands intertwined in her thick and fiery locks... every curve _obscenely_ pressed against him as he ran his hands through her hair.

Against his wishes heat flooded his body at the thought. It wasn't as if he had _actually_ felt it, but he could swear he could feel her in that moment. The warmth of her body so soothing and captivating, hair like ropes of fire burning him into oblivion as he stroked it... he'd dropped the link as soon as it had registered, but still...

It had been a very long time since he'd had any sort of pleasurable physical contact with another person... sexual or otherwise, and unfortunately for him he remembered all too well the way she felt cradled against him in the storage room. Even though she'd been unconscious, it awakened the part of him that longed for the touch of another.

She felt so small and fragile- delicate in a way that made him hate Lucius all the more for what he'd been doing to her. The odd protectiveness he felt bothered him almost as much as her scent. An oddly pleasurable mixture of cinnamon and burnt amber that lingered on his robes and shirt front for hours afterwards.

He stopped to lift the black fabric to his nose and inhaled. The faintest trace of her still clung to it and he dropped it abruptly, a strange sense of shame filling him.

Severus ran a frusterated hand through his slick black hair and set to pacing around his office. His dour mood surging forward like a black cloud that enveloped him in aggitation. That was nothing new. There always seemed to be a black cloud over him.

Was he some kind of lecher now?

It disturbed him to think that he could be aroused so easily by _thoughts_. Even more so that he had become aroused by a student, one who had already been subjected to the lust and perversion of an older man. She was half his age, for one, and despite her school girl fantasies it was against his morals to persue a student. Not to mention, it was perverted and illegal... but he'd _n_ _ever_ touch her the way Lucius did... and would most likely do again if Severus didn't figure out a way to prevent it.

He felt a resurgence of shame.

Sure, they weren't _his_ thoughts or fantasies but he'd been privvy to the beginnings of a fantasy that appeared to be on the way to an erotic encounter between himself and a student. A student that he'd become intangled with, whether he wanted it or not. He couldn't abandon her now. He truly wasn't such a bastard that he would be able to ignore or pretend that he didn't know of the horrors that awaited her.

Katja wasn't so much of a mistery. He could easily use ligilemens... but to use it to the extent he had last night was repulsive. It was a mental equivalent of rape in his opinion, and it could be nearly as violent and damaging to the victum. She was an absolute open book just ready for him to read at any moment, a young and naturally gifted ligilemens that had no idea that she walked around completely ungaurded, her thoughts a muggle television broadcast for any other ligilemens to pick up without even trying. It definately didn't help that she also subconsciously projected thoughts and images into his mind at random... ones that erred on the side of erotic.

To protect himself- and her- he supposed the best thing that he could do in this situation would be to teach her how to use occulemency to sheild her thoughts from others. As a natural ligilemens, it wouldn't prove to be too hard of a task.

Katja would take well to it. She was a good student. Although he was loathe to give up his limited free time... this school year would be infinitely easier if he didn't become so scatteted in the young witch's presence.

Resigning himself to evenings spent teaching Katja how to sheild herself with occulemency, Severus left his office with determined steps toward the Head Master's office. He would have to obtain permission from Dumbledore before he could teach her. He just hoped that the man didn't ask Severus to explain why he was volunteering to tutor her.

Almost before he realized it, he reached the stone Gryffin that gaurded the entrence to the Head Master's office. He regarded the statue for a moment, filling with discontent.

Would it be wise to be in such close and prolonged proximity to her? To dive into her over and over and unviel and unravel every thought, every fantasy, every memory that she gave up until she finally learned to block his intrusion?

He took a step back, hesitating to speak the password before he turned, the heels of his dragon hide boots clicking against the stones as he made his troubled way back to his classroom in the dungeons to prepair for his class, all the while reminding himself that _he_ was in control.

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Katja settled into her seat next to a blonde Hufflepuff named Nora Farlow, ignoring Draco completely as he tried to get her attention. She didn't hate Draco... but he looked so much like his father that it made her sick to her stomach to be near him. Not only that, but he was a complete prat most of the time.

She chewed nervously on the skin of her bottom lip, trying not to think of the shocked and disgusted look on Snape's face when he had seen that thought.

Katja still wasn't sure if Professor Snape would say anything about what happened in the great hall and she was dreading it.

As if called back to the dungeons by the meer thought of himself, the glaring Professor waltzed into the class room with his trademark black robes billowing. The effect was immediate.

A tense hush swept over her classmates, all eyes turned to watch Professor Snape who stood in front of the class with one eyebrow raised and a sneer poised on his lips.

Katja had to resist the urge to snort. The dear Professor must be laying it on thick today.

"As it would seem that none of you are remotely competent of showing even the slightest inclination or _hope_ of comprehension you will deliver 6 rolls of parchment on the Draught of Living Death- the potion you lackwits _attempted_ to brew yesterday by tomorrow..." he paused in his fuming to glare in her direction, " _and_ you will be rebrewing it today."

No one dared to protest but a deep collective sigh of disappointment echoed through the room. Katja narrowed her eyes at the Professor who continued to glare at her. With challenge in her eyes and a smirk twitching on her lips she sent him a silent message, knowing that he could hear.

 _You may try as hard as you like, but I'm pretty sure you aren't half the jerk you pretend to be. So save it. It doesn't bother me._

He didn't react at all. There was no caressing feeling of his mind touching hers... no probing fingers against her scalp. He simply raised a brow and turned to the cauldron he was standing by and commanded the class to give him their undivided attention.

katja frowned, pulling her long red braid over her shoulder and tightening the elastic that held it in place.


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